Why can't they see you? Why did nothing you did change anything? Why did the relationship feel so real to you — and so different to them?
A series that translates clinical psychology into plain language — for people who experienced narcissistic abuse and want to understand the mechanism behind it. No jargon without explanation. No theory without humanity.
The False Self as Selfobject
Why can't the narcissist perceive you as a separate, real person? The answer lies in a structural absence — not cruelty, but architecture. A deep dive into Kohut's selfobject theory and the othering failure.
Coming next
Healthy vs. Pathological Selfobjects
How to tell the difference between a healthy selfobject relationship and a pathological one — and what it means for how you heal.